Turn this place into our private getaway.

301. To the graduating seniors..

Wednesday, December 2, 2009; 1:49 PM

Its not that i dont like the senior guys.

Or that i'm biased or so.

here you go,

words for the 5 big brothers..

Hairul: Captain, thanks for all that you've taught me the whole of this year. You're a great role model i looked up to, and i thank you for all that you've sacrificed for the team. Though, there were times i hate you to the max especially during year 1 due to certain reasons, its all over then. Thanks for being so irritating and random when i see your chat box conversation pop out from my windows. You do make one smile. :)

Benjamin: My Vice-Captain, kiss your mother _ ok? You and your horrible english that never fails to make me smile and laugh and tease you. But you never mind being the center of the joke. You're like some stupid aunty, always so kaypoh and likes to hear us gossip. Thanks for always calming everyone of us when things get bad. Thanks for everything that you've tried to make me understand. Nobody would ever forget that they have to bring 2 cloth for camp next time.

Yongann: Stupid olympic. another kaypoh aunty. Putting down all your good points, you have tons of bad points. I hate your attitude i swear, and how you always look down on FAT people! dont try to deny you ass! Thankyou, for always being so patient still, never once seen you really flare up badly. Continue your journey from here, and then i'll say, i know Ng Yong Ann, that canoeist who represented Singapore!

ChounMeng: The clown of the team. Thankyou for being yourself, and always saying stupid things that make coach pump you and never ever once mind being the joke of the team too. The trademark word of yours - Chui~~. A caring senior, though you seems like those who bochup everything but afterall, you were great in your way. :)

Yudi: I remember when i first got up to T1, you sat beside me and taught me how to get in, i capsized and still, you helped me get up, empty the boat, and then helped me again. Yes, have not won your c1 in paddling K1 yet. but i would miss the times when the t1s fought with you tgt. come back and be pacer kae! :)

Hello Mummy, thanks for your guidance and your stupid psychotic mind that wanna burst people's balloon! Joanne, thanks for everything. really, i dont know what else to say now. so ok bye. LOL, please continue being such a dearest mummy and come back and take care of the team kae.

Hello daddy, LOL! noooo. you're the mouse in the team, always damn quiet. for reason nobody knows why. but still, you're like so talkative when it comes to smsing and msning. though i really gets really pek cek cause you're always so dao and shitty, still, thanks for all the encouragement and advices. i know i'm not an elephant. thanks bev. :)

Fishy: i wouldnt forget that very time when you offered me a big hug when i'm feeling so down. You, full of nonsense, never fail to get amazed by little little things. Then you're act like some kiddo when you're the tallest among all of us. and you'll be so happy. You'll get cheap stuff, nice donuts and matisu. :) i realise i dont really have a picture of just both of us but here you go, though its cropped but heeeee.

Adeline, lets start from here. The very first time we met to the first photo of both of us. I wouldnt deny because i knew you before you knew me and therefore going up to you, wanting to join canoe. You told me alot of stuff and tell me that enthu people tend to quit after going for trials. have i proved you wrong? you were the first senior that got so close to me and still is. :). Thankyou, for all the times when you've encouraged me, blogged for me and do silly things together. :) not forgetting the bad times when you tried to kill me. =(. and also, the times when i felt like killing you cause of your temper. but still, you're great. very very. i hope i could ever reach up to your standard some day. :) and also, i'll miss the times when we napped in LSR during the 5 weeks vacation and you'll always be the first person i wake up seeing. :) much misses ade(eddy).

last but not least, the REAL WOMAN of the 5 girls. heh. :). thanks for being ever so kiasu and aunty together with ben and yongann that never fails to make us laugh like some shit. you always rush and try to do things first and always make yourself look like a fool and have all of us laughing at you. will definitely miss your voice and your complaints. and your trademark phrase, I TELL KENGWI! HAHAHAHAHA! sihong, sihong.. :)

There.. time to soon step down. just a few words...

You're the big ass i swear. but i really have to thank you cause there were times you were of such great help and i couldnt do it without you. thanks for always being there to try to cover up for me. and being such a irritating fellow. hehe. thanks jaff, it was great working with you. really great.

eh ken, i dont have a picture of us together so tada. dont know if you would remember this photo, but stillllllllllllllll, hee. doesnt matter. you and your hot temper. im amazed by the patience i have in myself as not to give you a punch that sends you to outer space. times where you screwed all the 3 other captains and we all felt like killing you but you know what ken, cause of you, i guess we realised things faster and do things better. :) you're gonna graduate with the rest of the seniors and we'll definitely miss that skinny boy running around in tights and a white cap. hahaha. you and your stupid nonsense. you take care ok!

AND LASTLY TO CATH!

omggggggggggggggggggg. how would i have ever complete this whole year without you. thankyou soooooooooooo damnnnnn bloodddddddyyyyy much for tolerating with my give up shits and always telling me fuck you lah kel and go and die. cause despite all those, you've not fucked me and i'm still alive hahaha. thanks for always always trying to help me in ways or another, telling me to be strong tgt, we're gonna do this tgt and trying so hard to manage the stupid rebellious team. thanks so much. theres so much more but i'll do it on a seperate note ok.

big thanks meow, i owe you one.

Cheers to the 2 oldest male captains and the 2 youngest female captains.

Super cheers to the awesome 5 senior girls.

MEGA CHEERS TO RPC & COACH!

BEST DAMN THING EVER.

RPC, SAH!

Labels: Team, Teammates

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298. POLITE 2009.

Friday, November 27, 2009; 9:50 PM

28th November.

Intensive trainings ever since forever.

down to this day.

all for this day.

this major competition of the year.

What we've waited for long,

what we've been putting our heart and soul into.

here you go.

Less than 2 hours.

All water warriors from Republic Canoeing IG,

tomorrow is the day,

once again, we're gonna show them, its not gonna be an easy fight.

we're gonna do it, we're gonna prove it.

we will.

to the 6 partners,

i guess im the lucky one to have, 6 different partners eh?

straight finals, and all 7 of us know how much we want this.

so lets do it.

and elimate thoughts of regretting.

here we go.

to the remaining 2 girls.

Angeline, its your first year, participating in polite, and a great year, to actually have you as a frontman, and showing all of us your ability of being aggressive, high in frequency, and being such a strong girl.

You're gonna make it through the finishing line. I believe you're so much more stronger than what we've all seen in ncc/nwkc. Jiayou.

Xiaojun, *pause*

*pause*. *stone*. *pause*.

ok, maybe you'll read my mind, maybe you're not able to.

no point penning down all this thoughts here.

in anw, have i ever told you, you make a good backman?

:), the 3 girls ought to be lucky to have you, gun, engine or whatever. :)

show it girl, you know you can do it.

& to the real men of the team,

theres nothing much else to say,

you guys all know it yourself.

nothing left to hold back.

so, whack hard!

i guess, psychology assignment really can wait.

right now,

this is what i want.

tomorrow.

Coach Kaiyang came back today.

This is a great morale boost for all of us.

so come on and show what we've got.

You know, you can.

LAI, SAH!

Labels: Team, Teammates

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283. That body's like music to my ear.

Thursday, October 29, 2009; 10:20 PM

Heh, the best teammates i'll ever get. :)

heartfelt thanks to each and everyone of you.

i'm touched, very very.

i dont know how to express my thoughts now.

but i'm really surprised and happy.

very thoughtful team of girls i have with me.

& thank God for them, because without them, i wouldnt be as strong as i am now.

8 of them, yes, 8 of them,

concerned & worried.

not that i'm mean enough to allow them to feel that way lahhhh.

but i'm really relieved and glad and happy that wheeeee, they have me in their heart! :D

Xiaojun even went to the pharmacy to ask the pharmist what medicine is recommended for my situation.

Returned back to training after missing tuesdays and yesterday's.

It was quite funny because the team went to line up and was getting ready for warm up run,

and i was slowly, walking out of the sports complex just wanting to like sit and wait for them.

The girls was, "NONONO KELROY YOU STAY THEREEEE YOU DONT COME DOWN NO NEED TO RUNNNNN!!!"

hahahaha, hilarious.

before training they were still going like, "you dont train lah you suppose rest knowwww."

did as much as i can, though it hurts but still managable. :)

was pretty much treated like some...

hmm, i wouldnt say a princess or a casualty cause they rubbed salt onto my wound. =(

much more of a little kid or a fragile old woman.. =/

i was caught like walking down the stairs and they went, "you're not suppose to take the stairs you know!?"

damn hardcore and hahahaha, they just treated me like, i'm glass.

i wouldnt deny much that haha, yeah, quite dangerous but i'm not that weak lahhh!

but they really kept looking out for me, making sure that i'm taking care of my knee, myself. :)

heeeeee, they're wonderful still,

despite what Catherine said in the morning, what Xiaojun said in the afternoon and what Adeline said during lunch. hmph.

I still love them all. =)

Promise promise to take care of my kneee like me protecting golds and diamonds.

I dont want my 5 weeks holidays of training to go down the drain.

i've really placed in so much effort to see myself improve and all.

i want to paddle and continue paddling.

i want to be able to participate in the upcoming Polite and also next year's.

i really want to.

I dont really wish to talk about it.

i do feel like ignoring people when they ask.

but oh well.

life still goes on, no?

Parents on the other hand have been nagging much.

getting upset/angry with me that i still insist on training.

Daddy's last sentence to me this morning was rather..

hurting? =/

well, it got me feeling upset/angry/heartpain(for them).

I know that they do not want anything to happen to me,

& i'm gonna make sure nothing happens to me too.

Things on Joachim's side are more or less fine?

i guess he's more of worried than getting angry with my decision on continuing to train.

but i'm really thankful that hes supporting me and him, just being there for me.

always telling me to take care of my knee before training starts and asking hows my knee after training.

big thanks for cabbing down from school ytd to accompany me to have my xray taken,

to make me feel better, to make me less scared.

much lovezxzx!

ahhh,

finally its coming to the end of the week..

but no, weekends are packed with tons of stuff.

not to mention i still have to squeeze revision time into this packed weekend cause UT starts next monday.

and not forgetting i have work on sunday. 6pm - 11pm.

oh dear...

ok i'm tired and i think that boy wont be awake till tomorrow so...

goodnight! :D

Its friday, 30th october!

Its Sports & Exercise Nutrition tomorrow!

whee,

its gonna be a good day tomorrow. :)

goodnight!

Labels: Family, Joachim, Team, Teammates

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248. Even if the sky is falling down.

Monday, September 14, 2009; 12:20 AM

Ok, first up!

TAKE A LOOK AT RPC'S WORDPRESS!

BIG THANKYOU TO BEVERLY BRENDA KIM! :)

Very nice, very cute, very very goodzx. :D

http://republicanoe.wordpress.com/

Second, Adeline's Livejournal!
-
the Pol-ite feel is finally here.
to attend training, to train hard, to give it our best no matter how fatigue we may be feeling
its to the extend that our hands turned cold and numb, injuries starts to hurt but just continue to grit our teeth, flinging our arms, twisting our bodies, kicking and pulling, every strokes making the best of it.
know what's the best part?
it's when you turn around and see that you're not alone.
that you see the other 8 girls,undergoing the same shit as you, enduring the same pain and motivating.
9 K1 boats all lined up together, every now and then, full attendance.
how often do you see such a scenario. its totally un- describable

girls who don't bother much about getting their hair all short (except for cath and sihong)
girls who doesnt mind being bulky and tanned up like African kids
girls who doesnt bother when the guys said " huh, our team where got girls? all so man"
girls who train and play hard like nobody's business at the same time
tell me where to find such amazing girl's team

Pol-ite is going to be the last race for the senior batch.
lets make it happen this year. last year we had the women championship, this year, both.
we have been training really hard, continue striving and we will reap what we sow.
lets not even bother about those irritating whiney ones for now for they will only get into our nerves and make us suffer even more.

LAI ! lets all do it together. to both guys and girls who are worthy. Republic Canoe SA!
-

Ahhh. how nice. :)

Makes me smile. heeeeeeee.

OK, its gonna be monday.

Another week of intensive training.

I took leave for the whole of this week.

Training + Fun + Relaxing. :)

Lets see.

Monday - head down to Wilson's chalet after training. His engagement party! :) Then Nat's gonna give me a lift home since he stays nearby and whee, good. saves alot of trouble. :)

Tues - Training + steamboat(??).

Wed - Might have plans in the morning followed by training.

Thursday - Training.

Friday - TGIF! Training + Chilling.

Sat - Family day.

Sunday - Sentosa~ :)

Ahh. perfect!. :)

agreee with me.

OK work was quite retarded today.

haiya, nothing much to say anyway.

Anyway morning went to help out at the Mizuno wave run at NYP.

we were complaining like, damn gehkiang and all but oh well, we did had fun.

Baggage was chaotic esp when runners collect their bags but haha, shutter run, running forward and backward, shouting of toto numbers. heh. cooliozx. :)

Where do you find this kind of events with your teammates helping out.

Though there were only mostly senior guys + full attendance from girls, still, we had our own fun.

Though didnt get jersey size but all was fine.

Just that i woke up at 4am, spent $10.50 early in the morning cabbing to Xiaojun's place.

then another $6 to NYP.

Followed by me whining badly, close to flaring up at everybody because the migraine was like, wanna trigger dont wanna trigger off.

Heh, after awhile was fine.

Till leaving NYP, trained home with Xiaojun. :)

her turn to whine. haha.

Reached home bathe smack straight into bed till 2.30. bathe again and work!

OK NOTHING MUCH ALR RIGHT!

oh, meet up with Yeewen, Michelle and Mr Cris.

hmm, still alright? didnt really catch up alot. but better than nothing.

many thoughts, but, forget it.

OK.

THE END. :D

So.. let me see...

yknow, your words worked like magic.

unpredictable, special, surprising, and O.O!

yeah, like that.

everything that comes from you never fails to bring comfort to me.

The way you ease my mind is like, way damn unique.

"you like my sugar, my sugar, you so sweet, so sweet."

heh.

hello gangster,

where are you?

Labels: Deepthoughts, Team, Teammates, Training, Work

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245. The Mighty Ones.

Saturday, September 12, 2009; 11:20 AM

I like this photo alot.

The 5 seniors look exceptionally good.

Sihong looks (Y).

-
The 4 little ones. :D

Ok like i was saying, i guess as compared to other girls who are training,

They would mind about getting big, getting tanned and all.

But RPC girls just whack, without fear, without bothering getting bulked up and all.

Thats the difference.

& look at other teams and you see all the ponytails.

Ours just keep getting shorter. :/ (except cath's and sihong's)

Polite would be the senior's last race.

& no matter how hard i try to convince myself that, its ok, still can keep in contact what..

but fuck, i sure do will miss them, like a whole lot. =(

ok no emo kae.

yeah, anyway, all the strength speed endurance training is making me bulked up.

I mean it.

I dont usually gain alot from training, like last year or whenever.

But this time, just this time, i feel it.

My arms, my shoulder, fwah.

Not fat not fat luh!! >=(

just, very big, thats all. :/

OK WHATEVER!

I LOVE THE GIRLS! :D

Labels: Team, Teammates, Training

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243. Fire burning.

; 12:20 AM

i mean it when i said just shut up and train.
Seems like some people are still -.- damn. -.-. like that.
very irritating, very annoying.
this feeling is getting worse eh. -.-
its not a good sign.
i bear grudges much, know?

So i guess neither of us realise we've been training 2 weeks straight this way?
3 sessions of training everyday.
Crazy as it may seemed.
Appetite has grown, like, alot.
Despite burning lesser than the others due to the knee & not running tgt with the team but still, i'm burning the carbo so i guess its still fine to remain the appetite this way.
As it came to one point that, we either sleep and rest in the bus, or in the shed.
Excluding Monday & Thursday since we head back to RP to gym.
Tues, Wed, Friday. After lunch = head back to the shed to sleep.
I'd then go to that spot of mine, make myself comfortable, and then drift off.
Its quite nice to sleep there, really. :)
I mean, i think LSR has become another home for me and that, though its like filled with leaves, some ants crawling here and there, i guess i wouldnt really mind much but to just lay down and, sleep. :D

Training is turning like a crazy shit for all of us.
I swear! Its like, crazy, insane, & you just go to break through all your emotions, mental barriers and everything. Cause its impossible to go through just the motion and then pack up and go home. I swear you'd learn something and get something before packing up and heading home in the evening.

Yesterday we did 30s on 30s off. it was CRAZY. Frequency and power must be there and executing it was mad terrible. Your arms are flinging all around, no matter how tired, how sore, you just got to keep going. I swear at the end of ytd, satisfied much but it was really chui.
Today was 1 min on and 30s off. another chui session of training. luckily it was evening. morning session was 8 x 250m with a short hose tube tied underneath the boat which causes great resistance and paddling, kicking and twisting was like, WHACK SUDDEN AND HARD. like, hen tong leh. =(.

Yes, knee is, like, bad, *shake head* bad.
idk what else i can say alr. i just got to keep relying on tape. hoping and wishing i'd get through all till after november 29.

Training is crazy. Pain is crazy. but believe me when i say i'm loving the pain.
The feeling of your body feeling sore and sour when you wake up in the morning makes you wanna cry but deep down, the sense of achievement and satisfaction would be there, no doubt.
I believe, after this 5 weeks of intensive training, i will grow stronger.
Especially in mentality, definitely, much more stronger.
You just wouldnt know how crazy it is.
I just dont know how to let you know.
Thank goodness, the 8 girls are with me.
Tell me about it.
RPC mighty girls.
9 of us, paddling in k1, full attendance, chionging together.
Believe me when i say its a beautiful sight.
Beauty that you do not see on the external but internal.
just 9 boats, 9 girls, giving their best, heading towards the same direction, sharing only one goal.
tell me about it.

Check out facebook for our photos kae. :)

So like since it was running for the 2nd session of training today, everyone went ahead and i was left in the shed alone.
Pulled the stool over to my favourite corner, sat down and started reading, A Walk To Remember.
Filled with emotions, thoughts, and all sorts of those words you can relate to.
The rain started getting heavier. It was some kind of add on ambience shit thing that makes my mood even more. omg.
I swear i was so into the story and i started going crazy and people who came back from the run thought i was crazy.
gahh. end up crying, end up drying up the tears and end up tearing again.
Gosh.. (Y). the book was a good one, a very good one.
So again, i've learnt something new today! :)
The book was really great.

Today is friday, & i didnt have to work.
So head straight home after training today.
Unpacked and head out to meeting Xiaojun, Angeline & Joachim for supper.
Then back to Northvale playing games, having random talks and yeah, time to go home.
ok this is random but im staring out my balcony. the moon is, really nice tonight?
like, orangy red though its half covered by clouds but its really pretty.

Yay to weekends, sleep in more?
nahh.
I'm meeting Mr Cris, Yeewen & Michelle tomorrow evening for lunch. :)
Sunday 6.30am at NYP for helping out at the Mizuno run, then chionging down to the zoo to work at 3 - 11pm.
then its back to intensive training again!

Days are getting pass very very fast.
It gets a little torturous at times but i knocked off fast enough before i start having wild imaginations.
I wouldnt really say that everyday was a good day because, things are just not ok.
I hate pretending that things are fine.
I hate going through everyday like this. but.
I really dunno what else i can do.

-

It's never enough to say I'm sorry
It's never enough to say I care
But I'm caught between what you
Wanted from me, and knowing
If I give that to you
I might just disappear.

Nobody wins when everyone's losing

Oh, it's like

One step forward and two steps back
No matter what I do you're always mad
And I can't change your mind,

Oh, it's like

Trying to turn around on a one way street
I can't give you what you want
And it's killing me and I, I'm starting to see
Maybe we're not meant to be

It's never enough to say I love you
No, it's never enough to say I try
It's hard to believe that's there's
No way out for you and me
And it seems to be,
The story of our life

Nobody wins when everyone's losing

It's like one step forward and two steps back
No matter what I do you're always mad
And I can't change your mind, oh
It's like trying to turn around on a
One way street. I can't give
You what you want and it's killing me
And I, I'm starting to see
That maybe we're not meant to be

There's still time to turn this around
Should we be building this up
Instead of tearing it down
But I keep thinking
Maybe it's too late.

It's like one step forward
And two steps back,
No matter what I do
You're always mad and I
Can't change your mind, oh
It's like tryin to turn around
On a one way street
I can't give you what you want
And it's killing me and I,
I finally see,
Baby we're not meant to be

I don't need what you're giving me.

Labels: Deepthoughts, Friends, Team, Teammates, Training

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241. Lighting speed.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009; 10:57 PM

I'll make this a fast one. cause my phone is dying and i wna chiong into my room to charge it and cont replying the text messages coming in.

Since i've miss out planning doing something memorable and special for 070809, i'll do it on 090909 with...

this group of people. :)

Just, 9 of us.

Something simple, silly, funny, but all steady!

We're so gonna change into our secondary school pe attire after training tomorrow and laugh at each other, take photo and be happy and hyped up!

hahahaha, this is so exciting and i cant wait cant wait cant wait.

Catherine is gonna be in both pe attire and shorts!

SO OK FINE STEADY I ALSOOOO!

Westwood pe attire is worn by Wilson now so i'm wearing my Cedar house tee. LMAOOOO!

I DONT CARE!~ FUN FUN FUN! WHEEEE

Xiaojun, try to make it ok!

090909, meaningful not!?

NOT FOR YOU NEVERMIND!

FOR US US US US US!

wheeeeeee!!!!

Ok, didnt mean to pull down the whole blog entry to be something which is of fucking emo or what, but i need to state my thoughts?

Why?

Where has it gone to?

Despite all the hardwork, effort, time spent.

Neglecting alot, sacrificing alot, bearing it in mind that it would all be worth it.

Tell me, right now, is everything worth it?

After knowing the truth?

Fucking pointless.

Fucking hopeless.

Fucking helpless.

Why has things turn out this way?

I swear, i had to break through many doors to reach where i am now, here, today.

Hurt, bruised, broken, torn apart, whatever you said.

Injured, dying, weak, but still not giving up any moment.

The truth, hurts.

Crushed.

I'd really want a break for now.

& im not hesistating.

Cause, it wouldnt matter much, will it?

Fucking disappointed.

Fucking fucking disappointed.

Its never gonna be the same.

cause i know, no matter how much i try.

a loser, i'll always be.

so,

goodbye.

Labels: Teammates

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196. In your eyes, i see the missing pieces.

Friday, July 24, 2009; 9:38 PM

waiting for sihong's cam's photos to be uploaded on FB before i post it out here. :)
i do have some uploaded on FB alr. :)
but i want the full group photo!

friday, the day before NWKC. Made a pact with the 8 girls in the team,

to dress up, and go for carbo load at pastamania. :D

The plan to head town was cancelled because i was really feel very tired and restless.

not only me horr. :/

but still we did had fun at causeway point right!!!

please say yes.

attendance this week for school was bad.

nevermind. just damn screwed by some shit that happened.

i guess things are clearing up, i hope. :/

Tomorrow would be Nationals Women Kayak Championship.

My first year participating.

And the last year, the 5 seniors will participate in.

Screw RP, because we stopped training closed to 1 month, and not being able to compete under RP.

Expectations, definitely, i have for my own, and the girls have for themselves.

No matter what, i'm gonna give my best, despite not training intensively before NWKC.

I'm gonna whack hard, give my best shot, and cross the finishing line with regretting.

Xiaojun always says, Every stroke counts.

And trust me, i'm gonna make every single stroke counts.

Jiayou Xiaojun,
Jiayou to the other 7 girls.

No matter what the outcome is, know that you've given ur best shot,

& we're all here for you.

To the 8 Mighty Girls + Me!

JIAYOU, NO MATTER WHAT, JIAYOU!

Each and everyone of you,

get that in your mind;

To do our best, and be proud of ourselves.

Promise?

Promise.
=)

Labels: Team, Teammates

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184. 一辈子; Forever.

Monday, July 13, 2009; 8:40 PM

Because you live there's a reason why

I carry on when I lose the fight

Because you live, I live.

I have no pictures of you, Enna.

So there goes your little niece! :D

Lee Zuxian & Stella's photo is not in my lappie.

I'm not forgetting them!

Izzaidah, you're greatly missed too. :)

This post is equally random as this morning's.

However, it means alot.

This people above, played a part in my life.

Friends whom i can rely, for life.

Whom i trust, for life.

Especially the dearest canoeist girlfriends.

You guys are the one.

My pillar of strength,

thanks for being there, always.

Of course, there are many more people who contributes to

who i am today, what i am today.

but to not create any misunderstanding or mislead anyone.

I guess, it shall be left as,

*inserts picture*

yeap.

I realise i haven been taking photos with the angels.

I love my family, tons.

I mean it.

TONS.

Finally, i'm able to let everything out to Xiuhui.

omgosh, i've been waiting for this day for long.

Cause i know, your advice would be everything to me.

Yes, benchmark.

The One.

I've learnt from my mistakes.
I guess thats just the price i got to pay.

Thanks jie,

I love you.

If only i could turn back time...

Its ok.

I'm contented, now.

As long as everyone is fine and happy, I will be! :)

Words would be kept unspoken.

Till the time when its right.

(which i dont think it would come anytime soon)

Just dance, Gonna be ok.

OK!

the only complain today,

is the butt.

you spin my head right round right round.

would you fall to pieces, if i never came back.

take your sweet, sweet time.

I can wait, i can wait forever.

Labels: Deepthoughts, Family, Friends, Photos, Teammates

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136. Worned out.

Thursday, May 28, 2009; 11:12 PM

Its a signal.

i've been working myself too much, too hard.

it feels like,

i've been torned apart.

my legs totally gave way during the 6 x 400m.

i saw it coming anyway.

after finishing the 3rd set,

the whole of the left thigh tighten up and the feeling was bad enough for me to remember it forever.

i think i attracted alot of attention when i was screaming and shouting in pain.

yes, super paiseh, but the pain was unbearable.

big thanks to those who helped me just now.

thanks to the teammates.

:/ very paiseh still.

sigh, more warm up kel.

do more cool down stretching, rmb rmb rmb.

its time to take a short break.

stop pushing yourself so hard.

its not worth it.

today was a bad day.

it started off quite well though. :(

as expected, IPA sucks.

Faci sucks.

and my bad again for not managing the anger well enough.

totally slam the laptop down and walked out of class.

but if not for UT, i would have just packed my bag and left.

sucks. -.-

miscommunication sucks.

body not able to take it sucks.

ok shutup.

im really tired.

really am...

='(

Labels: NoteToSelf, Teammates, Training

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131. Inconsolable.

Monday, May 25, 2009; 11:23 PM

stop it.

stop coming to me.

i said stop,

stop it.

just. stop. it.

I'm really tired, I'm really tired.

what is this.

why is everything coming altogether at the same time.

i cant take it.

i need a breather.

my phone died right after i bathe.

rushed home because i hate this kind of empty feeling. (thats what Xjun call it)

i bought dinner and it bloody hell cost me $5.50!?!?!?!

ITS JUST A PACKET OF NOODLES WITH FILLET AND SAUSAGE WTH!

-.-.

should have just come home and drink milk.

yes, i still drank my milk and i think im growing fat tonight. -.-

rushed home, for what for what.

seemed to be meaningless.

priority..

speechless.

rj, compile results for running.

replied some email.

and im really tired.

my eyes are like that -.-

seriously like that -.-

I'm really tired.

i want to take a break but theres no break.

argh.

today was a bad day.

i need estacy.

training was tiring.

4 rounds around school was,

blank.

ok.

my msn nick pm was:

i need chocolates.

in the afternoon.

thats from my sweet girlfriend, bee. :)

then, i was feeling so horrible just now.

and surprise surprise!

(click on the above picture to enlarge it. dno why so small.)

Shes really sweet. :)

Haha, i have sweet teammates.

Thanks Fishy! :)

Its good to know that there are people who will be there to hold onto you when you're on the verge of breaking down.

I want chocolate milk.

I want MEIJI CHOCOLATE MILK!.

i just finish like 550ml of it and i'm damn tempted to gulp down the other 830ml bottle in the fridge.

FAT LUH KELROY!

不要再问了.

不要再烦我了.

我真的很累.

走开,

走开.

nothing i can say to make myself feel better now.

priorities.

maybe i should sort them all out one by one again.

I'm really tired.

i wanna sleep through tomorrow.

no, sociology.

no, no.

i need to sleep.

i wish i could find the words to say.

baby, i would tell you everytime you leave.

I'm inconsolable.

- scraping of initials -

i swear i went mad last night.

Smile delivery?

Labels: Rants, School, Screenshots, Teammates, Training

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128. Threading on thin ice.

Sunday, May 24, 2009; 9:07 PM

Firstly, im really glad all those efforts put into trainings, have not gone down the drain.

Coach saw the effort, Coach saw improvement.

What he said today brought me on cloud nine.

Train harder Kel, you're reaching there. :)

Was really exhausted after training today.

the water can continue being so choppy.

Study session wasn't productive because i couldnt get those notes into my mind.

I was really tired and sleepy.

Walked pokes home and headed home.

Journey home was really, blank.

I totally walked with an empty mind.

unsure of where i was heading to.

walked aimlessly.

and totally got horned by some stupid big shot car.

-.-

ok fine my fault for crossing the road without stopping to look.

lost. confused. whatever you call it.

just. didnt know what i was thinking luh.

Just kept walking, till i realised, oh i've reached the station.

Totally ignore the big M fastfood restaurant and walked straight home.

Was really tempted to go in and get the burger.

Never yield to temptations yoo.

I did it. :)

Scan all my polaroid shots into the lappie. :)

wheeee.

here goess!

We looked really alike this few days.

Or is it just my imagination?

Starbucks session back then. :)

After last sunday and yesterday's training!

The beloved girlfriends!

ok, Sociology UT tomorrow.

not looking forward to school tomorrow.

there's training tomorrow.

4 rounds around the school.

OH I NEED TO CHARGE IPOD LUH!

ok, done. :)

endurance training tomorrow i think.

go go go.

Sidenote:

its not really good to think alot.

have been thinking real loads this few days.

i should stop.

theres too much in my mind.

there are many things i want to give up on right now.

sigh, kick those thoughts away please.

Its not the time to think about this.

oh, glitz night coming.

great. oh great.

-.-

i hope you're ok with your parents alr.

i'm sorry if i did caused any trouble. :/

take care ok? please?

seriously, kick those thoughts away.

phobia stays, fears remains.

but no, dont think about it.

no. dont.

Labels: Friends, Photos, Teammates, Training

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080. Team Dinner!

Wednesday, April 8, 2009; 8:45 PM

OK, team dinner on Monday was quite a blast. :)

Though attendance was not full, occupying the whole long table of Thai Express was good enough and we were really noisy. And to think that the Manager believes that it was my birthday. Ahh, very good ah. Make use of me get free food.

The early birdies!

Its been long. We've come so far.

Here we are, the 9 mighty ones. :)

GIRL POWERRR!

Team RPC. :D

And to think they made so much noise! and they sang so many birthday songs, they crap they scream they run and they actually wanted to do the RPC cheer like really wanna woosh.

I ran off and i turn back in time to saw what exactly happen and the next morning i woke up batheing recalling of that incident, i was laughing to myself. hahaha.

Its quite funny that almost all were enthu in the cheer,

when Jaffar went, "READYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!"

AND EVERYONE RAN IN DIFFERENT DIRECTIONS!

HAHAHAHAHAHA!

DAMN FUNNY SHOULD HAVE RECORDED IT DOWN HAHAHAH!

i think no one expect Jaffar's "READY!" was so loud. HAHAHA

ANDDDDD!!!

This two lovely friends of mine bought jibbitz for me.

The one i wanted long ago, and i was really really happy. :)

SEE SEE SEEE!

VERY VERY CUTE RIGHT!

BIG THANKS TO JINKANG & XIAOJUN!

This skunk name is Flower.

SO CUTE SO CUTE SO CUTE!

Look closely, it has a belly button.

AHHHHHH!!!!! SO CUTE!

So its back to walking a few steps, looking down and going, "SO CUTEEE!" again!

AND DAMN YUSRI FOR STEPPING ON IT IM GONNA KILL YOUUUU! ROAR!

ok, more photos on Facebook. check it out yo!

Today's sun burned all those who did pyramid.

Im a lobster. *sings under the sea~*

my face is really red and my shades tan lines are damn freaking cool.

HAHAHA.

I like Fishy & Xiaojun's one!

damn cool damn cool.

Ade's batman looks cool too. hehehehe~

Ok im really tired and theres training tomorrow.

so rest early! ROAR!

It was really weird to be thinking of you while paddling just now.

I do not want that day to come.

I do not know what will i feel.

I will feel scared.

I will feel lost.

I will miss you.

Im sad that whatever is happening.

Im trying my best to give the best that i can to you.

I hope, you would see, that, I do love you, afterall.

Labels: Team, Teammates, Training

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069. Starry sky.

Monday, March 30, 2009; 11:59 PM

Im back in west, after spending like, 3days 2 nights in east.

That two nights spent at Ade's place was good. :)

With the company of the 3 lovely girls and one adorable dog, what more can i ask for?

hehehhee, will elaborate next time.

MR500 2009 came to an end.

Though i believe we could have put in so much more to beat that particular boat, its ok, cause its over and probably its my bad for doing last minute checking and assuming and also not giving out my best.

But i can say that this race is so much more better than polite's T2 500m. Its obvious by the timing and the feel of the boat. gliding, smooth, kicking and everything.

I dunno if it will really be the last time i've paddling on T2 with Xiaojun, but till where is ends, MR500`09, was a great memorable 500m we've went through. :)

Thanks, T2 partner, me love you many.

there is so much more i want to say, but i shall find the time to blog again ok?

there is really so much so much to blog about.

:D, its like camping at the east. hahahahaha. it was great fun yoo!

ok, BIIIGGG thankyou to my boy who travelled for hours just to support me for my race which lasted for less than 3 mins.

Thank goodness he arrived minutes before i was about report to the starting line cause i was in such a nervous and anxious state that i thought i would have just died on the spot. :/

Thankyou!

A 3 day break!

And last minute decision to head to night safari!

YAY!

Definitely i enjoyed myself so much!

I got really excited and all! hehehehehe, it was really nice.

Elephants were gorgeoussss. :D

Flying squirrels were ADORABLE TO THE MAX! :D!~

LIKE THEY FLYYYYY, GLIDEEEE, AND PIAK TO THE TREE TRUNK!

HAHAHAHAHAHA!

hehehehe,

And the malayan tigers were adopted by tiger balm.

how cute. hahahaha.

Joshua named today as - Kelroy Day.

So he paid for everything luh.

really everything.

I enjoyed my day alot. today was really fun and greatttt.

its been long since we went out together like that. hehehe.

theres more to come!

I hope you had fun too!

Lovezxxzx! :D

OK TOMORROW?!

K BYE!

Labels: J, Teammates

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061. Friends Forever.

Thursday, March 19, 2009; 11:26 PM

im currently talking to Catherine & Adeline.

Happily entertaining ourselves.

hahahaa, webcaming with both of them.

hahahahaha, love love.

3/4 of our k4 luhhh.

XJ XJ XJ WHERE YOUUUU!

hahahaha, went out aft training today.

hehehe, got very happy de. :)

hehehehe. damn crazy damn fun.

except when the heart starts hurting.

sian.

see they happily take our their pets come say hi.

ade takes mochi.

cat takes rabbit.

me leh!?

say hello to the pets lorh.

lol.

ok, i love them. heeeezx.

I LOVE ADELINE CATHERINE XIAOJUN. :)

Me love me k4. :D

i love others still luh.

Maomaooooooooooo, 3 more days.

@_@

Labels: Friends, J, Teammates

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041. Never looking back again.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009; 10:37 AM

YOYOYOYOYOYO~

ok, sunday i didnt work in RFK.

Manager last min call me say i work in kiosk. :/

so Sunday was quite awkward cause i realised theres only 2 person working in the kiosk.

And it was a guy, a little one. :/

We started off quite quiet and after which i realised hes from dragonboat and used to be in canoe then we just kept talking. hahahaha. :)

Hes 16 this year and hes quite cute in his size luh hor? tiny yet muscular?

hahahahha, yeap, we both got scolded by customers that day luh, but it really isnt out fault!

Afterall, working at the kiosk with him quite fun too. hes damn crappy.

Oh Oh Oh! I think his name is Beng Koon. Everyone calls him ah beng. HAHA! :)

Urm, yesterdays training was def a killer.

Like, so much things to do.

Ok, apologies to the team if i was really being very hot tempered yesterday.

My bad that i allow emotions to took over.

But yesterday's land training was quite shiong when i went to the extend of pushing myself so hard for each weight sets.

good, im growing!

I woke up with my back muscles in paint.

Adeline says thats good cause im growing! :)

yayyyyy!~

Pull up pull up pull up!!!!!!!!

After training, the rain dampened our mood at first,

but eventually the rain became smaller. and yay!

continue with out plan!

YAY YAY YAY!

So the people namely, Adeline, Beverly, Gary, Joanne, Markcus, Tomi, Xiaojun!

after lunch we walked to causeway to meet Joshua. :)

We headed to Marina barrage after that!

Thanks Bev for borrowing DSLR from her dad.

Xiaojun and me has been talking about this since dunno when.

but because we're so busy with training we just, didnt carry out with the plan.

yessah, finally we did.

A mini casual photoshoot and i bet everyone had fun!

The place was damn great, great scenery and everything!

And Xiaojun and Markcus indeed have great photography skills.

Xiaojun digital cam is superb!

The first few shot she took for Joshua and I was fabbbb!!!!

And i realised everyone took photos for Joshua and I except for Adeline!

Many solo nice shots for Adeline! Happily being the model luh!

hahahahaha! very very cute.

Everyone had individual solo shots bahhh. :)

Then Joshua took over as the photographer and help the canoeist take! :)

yay, ok, then headed back to the mrt.

We walked like how long sia~!

We just kept singing and talking rubbish.

hahahahahaha. :)

We(me, joshua) headed back to cck first since i dun wanna go home late. :/

ate and chop chop go home looo!

Bathe, smack, sleep.

Ok, i've got work later! RFK RFK RFK!

hope theres fun people... :/

ok, see ya guys soon!

Thanks to the 7 canoeists yesterday! :)

Thanks for everything. :)

I cant wait for the photos to be out!

Especially, big thanks to Xiaojun! :)

I love you to the maxx!

Just call my name, I'll be there.

Yes you, you know who you are.

Labels: Friends, J, Teammates, Training

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038. Friends; Shinning Friends.

Friday, February 20, 2009; 12:20 AM

To the dearest beloved team/teammates,

I'm sorry if I've disappointed you guys in ways or another,

but I'm trying, I have yet give up, I'm still trying.

I hope things are getting better,

We(the committee) are infact all trying, and we all definitely wants the best for the team.

and I hope, we would be able to reach to our goal, something we've been dying to achieve.

Jiayou, RPCanoeist, SA!

To the dearest beloved friends.

Its not really nice to see each and everyone of you drowning in your own sorrows.

I know I'm not superman, neither someone with great super powers.

However, if you're ready to share, I'm more than willing to listen.

If ever one day, you'd collaspe, please bear in mind, I will be there, the others will be there.

We'll all be there for you, grabbing your hands, pulling you up.

Count on us, you can trust all of us, no one will let anyone else fall.

I do not know if i have the ability,

but I'm trying not to let ANY of you fall.

当你已经不能承受一切, 告诉我. 我会尽全力, 帮助你.

加油了，亲爱的朋友们！

JUST CALL MY NAME, I'LL BE THERE!

Labels: Friends, Team, Teammates

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036. The more we get together. :)

Tuesday, February 17, 2009; 11:14 AM

Friends, all my love. :)

Ever since the start of work at zoo, my life have been revolving all around the same old ppl.

hahaha, mostly the canoeists. :).

Xiaojun, Adeline, Sihong, Tomi, Markcus, Gary. :).

Haha, this few days have been just randomly going here and there, to chat, slack, chill or do stupid things. :)

We went over to Melvin's house for cny dinner the other day, i've yet post pictures up cause i only have a few.

Then we have steam boat session which consist of: Adeline, Fishy, Sihong, Melvin, Beverly, Joanne, Markcus & Xiaojun. :). 3 hours of eating kills ok. i swear i was feeling freak bloated when Adeline claims that shes not even fulllllll!?!?!?!?!?!!

You can never judge her man.... hahahahah.

We went over to Terminal 3 yesterday for Popoeyes~ :D.

before that we had some talk cock session. Adeline and xiaojun was the cutest when they were sharing their personal story. hehehehehe.

ESP XIAOJUN LUH!

fall off from double decker, stone and, starts crying. HAHAHAHAHA. the way she imitates just simply make everyone LOL man!.

And i declare Adeline is officially abnormal. Her size match with her timidness. HOWEVER! when comparing to her appetite, its totoally opposite. see, weird girl...

I hope everyone had fun ytd despite the emo session here and there.

almost everyone was feeling down. =(

but i guess things got a lil better when we finished our dinner and we were talking. :).

And say hello to our new canoeist who have just joined us, Markcus. yay. :D

no more left out in conversation liao horrrrrr. :D

hahaha, anyway, i almost didnt get to work for the whole week, wah lao scare me.

ok, this week abit slack. 2 days nia. today and sunday.

working from 2-6 later. closing dahhhh.

and sunday, 10.30am - 6.30pm. :D sundays = fun.

tues = fun too.

Wilson and Erica will be there = VERY VERY FUN! :D.

hahahahhaa.

Working with them both and Juliet is super funny i swear. :)

I dunno what else to say. but i'm tireddddd~

i woke up at 3am wanting to whine in pain.

cramps are killing me.

damn itttt.....

nurofen... i want my nurofen...

T.T

liddat how to work luhhhhhhhh omgoshhhh

I thought i would be really busy.

busy enough to keep everything off my mind.

WHO KNOWS!?

JOSHUA IS WAY BUSIER THAN ME!.

bwarh... =(

ok i go youtube-ing alr. bye!~

I miss you.

Labels: Friends, J, Teammates, Work

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028. Open up your mind and see like me.

Sunday, February 1, 2009; 5:59 PM

The zoo didnt call me.
Bye to that job.
=(

Saturday training was a freaking killer.
12 marathon rounds killed me.
ok, i only completed 8.
PT killed me further,
I WANNA CRY AH!
Now i realise how it feels like you train till you wanna cry.

Lunch and headed to Charmaine's.
Poopy and Cody was freaking cute! :)
Especially Cody, hahahaha, excluding the part he shitted and pee-ed.

Dinner at bugis and home. smack right straight in the bed after showering.

Dragged myself up this morning. goodness.
Todays training attendance was like 6? T.T
Lala joined us for training today.
7 marathon rounds.
I COMPLETED MY ROUNDS! A ROUND OF APPLAUSE PLEASE!
its good to know that the feel of the strokes can be seen alr. :) *twist*
Bathe, lunch and daddy picked me up, supposed to sleep but got to check schdule.

and i've not gotten my nap at all. =(
oh well. nvm.
I pray that things get better.
LET EVERYONE BE HAPPY PLEASE!
JUST DANCEEEEE, GONNA BE OKKKKKKKK~~~~~~~

Got to thank the team mates for encouraging me yesterday and also today.
Love deep deep, deeper than the reservoir yo!

Joshua is out to a restaurantttt.
i want good food too.
Im craving for junks.
oh shit.

I'll probably die before gym session tomorrow.
double training session lehhhhhh.
*lays dead on the bed*

Goodbye people.
I'm growing bigger.
Not fatter yo.

Labels: Teammates, Training

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016. Resolutions, Not?

Sunday, January 18, 2009; 9:35 PM

Ok,

I know its been 18 days since 01 Jan.

I dont really believe in resolutions.

Its one more week to the big 18th.

Ok, maybe not really big after all.

Its kind of a note to self.

And something i really want to like, make it right.

1) Shelfs that belonged to me in the living room and my room must be kept NEATLY!

2) Time management! Training, Work, Family, Friends, Joshua, School(April).

3) Sleep early, EACH NIGHT! No more staying up till the wee hours.

4) Control of food consumption.

5) PULL MYSELF UP THE BAR! THIS MUST BE DONE ASAP!

6) Focus more during training. Get balancing on Kboat. Esp for K2.

7) Be more sensible, mature, needing, not wanting. Not disappointing Daddy.

8) Control of handphone bills.

9) Take good care of myself on my own.

10) Determination & Confidence, i need you back.

OK! DONE! :).

ok, as for the bad habits like,

smelling my hands, and, leaving no space for the last seat on the sofa due to my bag stacking, not folding my blankie each morning and all, i'll try.
Maybe not enough, but i'm still trying HOR!

OK!

Updatesss!

This are the people whom have been revolving around in my life! :D

PHOTOS UP!

the day i bought my yellow crocs.

i got so excited about it that every few steps i take, i look down and admire my crocs.

and i'll go, "so cute leh!"

i think they got pretty irritated by me!

Markcus's Purple

Xiaojun's Red

Kelroy's Yellow

YAY! they wore crocs for me to take photo tgt!

IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE! i bet many were staring.

Like hey, hello, we're the crocs gang, wanna join?

Get a pair of cool crocs first!

No cool crocs, no join!

LOL! (Enna you can forget about joining!)

Triangle Love.

PLEASE LOL WITH ME!

When Beverly states who she wants to be with(Me or Markcus),

then i'll update you guys! :D

Me and Bev?

Me and Xiaojun?

Xiaojun & Bev?

Hmm. Very scandalous indeed.

this is their term of acting cute without smiling.

Xiaojun & Bev looks pretty fierce.

I was obviously um-chioing alr.

I bought the woodstock lanyard for her,

Joshua bought the snoopy one for me.

Freaking cute. :)

Say hi to Markcus.

Then to Xiaojun and Markcus!

Left: To Markcus, Xiaojun & Yuanyuan!

Right: Bought the kayaker jitbitz. CUTE!

OK!

Mass pictures of Xiaojun and Markcus.

Also, Bevie and Yuanyuan!

NEXT UP!

W47D!

Yvonne's 20th!

Ah, my striking yellow crocs. :D

Side track but yes,

This girl here.

Since the day i started canoe training, till now, shes still with me. :)

We weren't that close in the start, but as people walked away, i realised, shes the one i can count on.

Xiang Yi Wei Ming is the term we always used. Since we're in the same course, it make things so much better.

Common topics, complaining about the same thing, shared thoughts while paddling on T2.

We've come quite far, to now, on K2. :)

Shes quite a perfectionist and i'm quite stressful to paddle with her hor!

However, shes able to push me to my limits. :).

I know for the upcoming 2 years in RP, being academic wise or training, i know i can count on you. :)

I thank God for you. :D

Love you Xiaojun. :D.

Love, Your Eff-er. :D

(no Joshua, shes your hardcore fan, so stop thinking what u're thinking.)

Not forgetting the Wees.

I'll try to get a photo of the 5/6 of us up soon! :D

And i wanna take photo with MAMA & PAPA!~

Those who are interested in Ian, i'll probably see him during CNY,

try kae? :D

Enna, when can i take a photo with you?

Freaking dua pai hor. LOL!

Btw, thanks for the birthday wish LEH!

Idiotzxz!

OK DONE!

NO MORE!

BYEBYE!

HAHA, how can i forget this boy of mine. :)

Thanks for the times when you kept calm while i vented, cried, throw tantrums.

You leave the best for me, food wise, attention, everything.

You talked sense to me.

You keep me calm when i'm down.

You love me more than i do.

You stayed although i made you sad, hurt or angry.

Your faith, your trust, your love for me, made me feel special.

All in all, Joshua, I love you.

I'm definitely in love with you.

Still in love with you. :)

-sends global kiss-

TDDUP; LTIMH.

BED TIME!

NIGHTS!

Labels: Family, Friends, J, NoteToSelf, Screenshots, Teammates

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