ok, its my last day at work.
im relieved.
work used to be, fun.
and when i got transfered to amk, i stayed on despite feeling shit.
why? i'll keep the reason to myself.
and, now quitting the job, means more time to study.
and partly because, the reason of staying became, no meaning anymore.
During the 6 hours at work.
distracted, not focus. i dunno whats wrong.
instead of toast bread it became burnt bread.
i broke 2 plates, and the toast that i cut was not even.
because of me, the manager got lectured.
sigh, ok. this is killing me.
i thought alot.
really. alot.
i think im leading a very lost life now.
i dunno what i want.
yes, blame it on me.
im the cause of this.
i do not know how to even explain myself anymore.
to think that, you were the one who understand me the most?
no, not anymore.
I talked to wilson at work.
i thought of how he first taught me to scoop ice cream in RFK and all.
he still do talk to me and make me feel better when my days in AMK suck ttm.
but yeah, thanks wilson.
i'll return someday.
Rashid's reaction was damn random when i told him it was my last day.
totally stoned and thought i was kidding.
then he said,
"bye kelroy, i'll miss you"
when i was packing up.
it was like, argh, damn sad please.
ok, i bet i'll miss people in the zoo like tons but.
there are more things i need to focus on now.
but im losing focus in almost everything and i feel like shit.
i need to get myself back on track.
To a particular someone.
sometimes, the words you say,
hurts alot.
im unsure but its definitely affecting me a whole bunch.
I want to tell you,
but something is holding me back.
i need the courage. right here. right now.
I'm really tired.
im sorry.
for everything.
but.
nvm, im really more than just tired,
to continue explaining.
more explaination leads to more asumptions that others would think of,
im not trying to cover anything up.
I want to follow my heart.
Labels: Work